The Question
by Sorrel
Summary: PostRosetta, Clark decides to make sure that he can never fulfill JorEl's version of his destiny. Lex objects.


**The Question.

* * *

**

It's a peaceful day. The sky is a soft blue-gray, with small fluffy clouds drifting, and a hawk cries out as it wheels above his head. He's standing on a small outcropping of rock, the bitter winter wind ruffling his hair, but he doesn't feel the cold. Hasn't for at least two years, and it's just one more thing that's wrong with him.

"There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy," he whispers, and his voice cracks on a half-hysterical laugh. Oh, if only they knew.

He has it all worked out. The fall itself probably won't hurt him- he's been forced to jump off the top of the dam before, and it didn't do him any damage. Crater Lake, however, which is filled with Kryptonite, probably will. All he has to do is jump.

No. Not even that. All he has to do is let himself fall.

One little step forward, and gravity will take its course. The only thing left for him to decide is if he wants to take the step.

"To be or not to be, that is the question," he says. Hamlet is just so _fitting_ for this moment. "Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer the stings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or take up arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing them, end them."

Clark doesn't have a sea of troubles. Clark's only trouble is himself, but he is a planet's worth of trouble in one stealth package. No one would ever suspect that one farm boy from Kansas is actually an alien sent to Earth to conquer it.

His dad told him that he is going to be a force for good, not for evil, but Clark isn't sure that he believes that. His dad does, definitely, but his reasoning is the adult equivalent of "just because." Clark doesn't think that's particularly comforting, though he didn't tell his Dad that. He just let himself be hugged, and pretended that everything was fine. Even though it's nothing like fine.

His dad thinks that everything will be fine because he's been raised an honest kid. But his dad doesn't know what it's like to have the ability to truly hurt someone. Absolute power corrupts absolutely, and no one else on this planet has power as absolute as Clark's. One weakness, and what if no one knows it if the time comes to stop him? Even if they knew, there's so few who could really stop him if he didn't want to be stopped, and Clark is so afraid of himself. Better to use that weakness now, when he still can, than later, when he might not want to be stopped.

"Clark?" he hears a voice behind him say, and somehow he's not surprised when he turns to see Lex standing there. Lex is a few feet back, his feet planted firmly on solid ground, unlike Clark who is standing on rock that feels none-too-stable beneath his booted feet.

"Lex," he says. Easy to acknowledge Lex, and has he ever not? Lex is such a huge part of his life that it's almost impossible to believe that he's only known him for a year and a half.

"Clark, what are you doing out here?" Cautious voice. Lex knows perfectly well what he's doing, but he's trying to ease Clark into confessing to him, just like he's always done. Until now, he hasn't been ready to confess anything.

"Getting ready to fall," he says, and he's never, ever seen that look on Lex's face before. Something close to it, when Lex had walked into the plant and let his vest drop to the floor, when Eric had gotten his powers and he'd been in the hospital with his ribs taped, and a hundred other times when Lex was worried about him, with or without reason. But never quite like this, like Clark had stabbed him through the heart. Sheer shock, and grieving already. He probably knows that he can't stop Clark when Clark has decided on something. No one can.

"Clark, you can't do this."

"Of course I can, Lex," he says, and he's actually smiling. Lex is always so stubborn, even in the face of reality. "Gravity works even on me."

"There's people who love you," Lex says desperately. "Your parents, you friends. None could bear to lose you. Don't do this."

Better, Clark thinks. Ordering him, rather than just denying the obvious. But still useless. "I have to end it while I still can, Lex," he says. "If I don't do it now, I might not be able to stop myself when the time comes. And it will, Lex. You're the one who's always telling me that you can't avoid your blood."

"Clark, I don't know what prompted this, but I'm sure that you don't-"

"I was sent here to conquer," Clark interrupts. His smile is sad. "That's what he told me. 'They're a flawed race, Kal-El. You are a god among insects.' And there's no one on this planet, Lex, who is as strong as I am. Blood always tells, and who's to stop me when it does?"

"Your father- Rule us- Clark, what-"

Lex is always so adorable when he's speechless. Clark wishes that he could better appreciate it now. "Alien, Lex. You did hit me with your car that day on the bridge." He smiles at Lex. "I'm really glad that I can tell you before I die. I wanted to, you know. But it never really seemed like the right time."

"And your imminent suicide is?" Lex demands. He's cute when he's angry too, and he's definitely angry now. "Clark, don't do this. The idea of you taking over the world is ridiculous. Get off the ledge. Please, Clark."

It's the "please" that almost does it. Lex never says please. But Clark stands strong. He has to. The world is at stake.

"I can't," he says. "I have to stop myself while I still can. And no one can talk me out of it. Even you."

"Clark-" Lex sounds so defeated, and Clark never meant to make him sound like that. But this must be done.

"I'm really glad it's you here, Lex," he says. Wants to touch Lex, one last time, but won't move from his spot because if he does that he might lose his nerve. "I wouldn't want it to be anyone else."

"Clark!" Lex yells, but Clark just smiles at him and steps backwards off the ledge.

Lex's face is the last thing he sees as he falls.

* * *

Only he continues to see Lex's face, because for some reason, he's not falling. At all. In fact, he's just hovering there, and he's pretty sure that he looks really stupid as he gapes at his feet, which are resting on absolutely empty air, but who wouldn't?

Lex gapes a little bit too, before taking the opportunity to run forward and grab Clark's wrist, tugging him forward and back onto solid ground. He stumbles into Lex's arms when gravity starts to work again, and Lex just holds him, wrapping his arms tightly around Clark's middle, as tight as he can like he could actually, physically restraining Clark from doing anything like that ever again.

Clark knows this because Lex is muttering into his chest, and his mutters sound very much like, "I'm never letting you do anything like that ever again," and upon reflection, Clark realizes that it was pretty stupid. If he'd actually fallen, he wouldn't be able to be feeling Lex's arms around him right now, and that would be unacceptable, even to a dead man.

"I'm sorry," he whispers to the crown of Lex's head, and Lex jerks his head back so fast he must have given himself whiplash, glaring into Clark's eyes.

"You better damn well be," Lex growls at him. "I don't know what I would have done without you. If you ever put me through something like that again, I'll-" He pauses, clearly at a loss for something to do to Clark, but he finishes, "-I'll think of something. And you will really, truly, honestly not like it."

"I'm sorry," he says again, and Lex just sighs, his body going slack in Clark's arms. "I know. It's just… God, Clark. I thought I'd lost you." He buries his face in Clark's chest again, and Clark can't do anything but tighten his grip and just hold on.

"It's bullshit, you know," Lex says, after several minutes. He tilts his head back up again, and his gaze is entirely earnest. "You'd never rule the world. You'd never be a danger to anybody, in fact. I don't care what anyone else says. _I_ say that you're the best person I've ever met, maybe the best person in the world, and that's all there is to it."

Clark laughs a little, weakly, and then… Then he just gives in and tilts his head down, pressing his lips to Lex's. Lex kisses him back, mostly close-mouthed and sweet.

"Well," Clark whispers, air from his words brushing against Lex's mouth, "if you say so, it must be true."

"It must," Lex agrees, and then kisses him again.

Several minutes later, Lex pulls away, panting and flushed, and says, "So. Flying, huh?"

Clark gives in and laughs.


End file.
